I’m discovering some things about myself during this adventure in writing. They’re not all new things, nor are they necessarily great revelations about anything significant (except, maybe, to me). It’s just that I am noticing and paying attention to my feelings, and find myself trying to put those feelings into words – all through the day. I’ve also started to pay attention to the ebb and flow of those feelings. But, it’s more than just feelings. I’ve started to pay attention to how I experience ME – the who, what, where, when, how (and now what) of my life. I’m not quite ready to commit it all to writing, but it is refreshing and exciting to dive into my experience of life and attempt to capture it with words. Those of you who have read the few things I’ve written, and those of you who “liked” it, have inspired me to continue on this adventure.
The words escape me, but
I know I felt it sometime today
Maybe it was after I had that apple pie
Or was it while I watched the baby cry
I know I felt it, but
Where was I when it happened
And how could I forget the way it felt today
Or maybe, just maybe, it happened yesterday
Now the moment’s gone, but
The feeling will return one day
I don’t know the what or how or who or where
But I’ll be ready with words – and words to share
I love the first two lines, but I tend to think the fourth and fifth line seem a little childish. I have nothing against poems that rhyme, rhyme can be fantastic, but sometimes it can look forced and spoil the whole poem.
Those two lines read as if you just needed to find two words that rhymed and built the lines around that.
Sorry if this causes any offence. Feel free to ignore me.
No offense taken. I was experimenting, and I agree that I did force the rhyme in this one. Thank you for your comments.
As long as it was taken as intended and you found it in some way useful. 🙂